The importance of gifts we leave behind

New York in Malacca

Malacca, Malaysia


Early in 1988, a newlywed couple from the States was traveling in Malaysia. While in the ethnically diverse, historical treasure-trove of a town called Malacca (Melaka), they hired the services of a 60-year-old rickshaw driver named Peter Ong. Thanks to a simple act of thoughtfulness on their part, Peter remembers them still today.

I met Peter myself in late 2007, when he also offered his rickshaw services to me. Pulling out a handful of postcards from previous customers, he seemed particularly happy with one from New York and invited me to check out the back, which read:

Dear Mr. Ong,

You’ve been a wonderful and knowledgeable tour guide through Melaka. You were kind and thoughtful (thanks for the bag of bananas!).

Thanks for recommending Chang Hoe Hotel.

Best Wishes,
Scott & Jennifer Ingber
New York USA

The card was dated January 30, 1988, and friction had so worn the front cover that New York’s skyscrapers seemed to be chain smoking. Though I didn’t take Peter up on his offer—I needed to stay on foot to get the pictures I was after—we did talk for several minutes while waiting under an awning for a rain shower to pass. I learned that Peter was born in January 1928, that he’d been driving a rickshaw for 40 years, and that he had seven grown kids living in Malacca, Kuala Lumpur, and Singapore.

Months later I would google Scott and Jennifer and see their 1987 wedding announcement in the New York Times. Other than what I read there—he was a doctor and she a nurse—I know nothing about them. Except, I suppose, that their tangible thoughtfulness is still remembered two decades later by a man in Malacca, and has probably helped that man grow his business.

When Peter Ong holds up his postcard, then, he is not just showing us New York; he is reminding us that in travel, even when we give in small ways in a town through which we are so briefly passing, it matters.

Posted by | Comments (4)  | November 19, 2009
Category: Images from the road


4 Responses to “The importance of gifts we leave behind”

  1. Lindsey Says:

    I’d say, Joel- this might be your deepest hitting post. (Not; to admit that every other one hasn’t sparked an emotional core)
    However; when we travel- or litterly; when we take the moment to step out our door and make a connection-we affect some other course. Just how deeply that ice is broken we will at times; never know. Yet, the chance- the common ground may be the beauty of each individual existence on this planet.
    Thank you for your articulate mind and attention to the lives of the world. May others walk with the awareness and kindness that you have embodied in your ventures.

  2. Travelfusion Says:

    What a lovely article that honestly brings tears to my eyes.

    It’s so true that even the smallest gesture of kindness can go such a long way – we never know whose lives we touch.

    Thanks for the great post!

    Kathryn @Travelfusion

  3. Barbara & David Ingber Says:

    I am so proud to say that these are our children