Bad days and their positive impact

Travel, for me, has always been an amazing journey into the discovery of what connects us all as human beings. Travel is also hard, exhausting, and seriously trying on the nerves at times. The dichotomy that exists within the experience of traveling is part of what makes it so worthwhile. It’s this dichotomy that forces us to really reflect on Below are my top five worst travel experiences, paired with the the most positive takeaway from each experience. Travel may be difficult, but it is certainly still worth it.

5. The day the car broke down at the amusement park. This one may seem like it wouldn’t be such a big deal but when it’s a group of high schoolers, with no money, who find their car to be utterly incapable of starting after a day riding roller coasters, the scenario looks a little more grim.

After prom (one I did not attend), my friends and I headed to an amusement park to celebrate. We drove two cars and arrived with no incident. Ten hours or so later, we headed back to the parking lot to find one of the ancient vehicles we drove across the state, completely dead. Imagine that. We tried jumping it, we tried starting it, over and over. As it became clear that we were not going anywhere, tempers started to flare and the blame game began. Ten teenagers were standing in the parking lot trying to figure out how to fix this and no one had any good ideas.  After much debating we called two parents to come rescue us and spent the late night ride home complaining and blaming. We would find out later that it was the starter that had gone bad, nothing anyone could really have predicted. That incident would flavor our friendships and conversations for the rest of the school year- a couple of people even stopped talking for a while because of what happened. In fact, it’s still a topic that comes up whenever more than two of us end up in a room together.

Positive take away: Problem solving. Between the ages of 16 and 18, none of us was very skilled at calm, effective problem solving. We did our best to get ourselves out of a sticky situation but the reality is that this became a serious learning experience for all of us. With no adults around, we were left to our own devices to figure out a plan. It was messy, not very nice, and involved a lot of drama. As an adult, I realize how important this process was, even the uncomfortable aftermath of so much blame being thrown around. Kids need space to figure out their own messes as often as possible. We definitely got practice in that area, the day the car broke down at the amusement park.

4. Getting stung by a scorpion in the middle of the night. I rolled over in bed one night and jumped up, screaming. In my half-awake state I had no idea what had happened but my leg was on fire. A quick inspection of the bed uncovered a scorpion and suddenly, the pain made sense. This wouldn’t have even been that bad if getting stung by a scorpion hadn’t been on my list of travel fears and if it hadn’t happened IN MY BED. There is something extra awful about being woken up from a sound sleep by a sharp shooting pain caused by an uninvited guest. The stuff nightmares are made of.

Positive take away: Shake your sheets out before you go to bed. Not exactly philosophical but seriously valuable lesson for any traveler. Oh, and checking your shoes isn’t a bad idea either.

3. The day nothing went right. You may be surprised but this was not one day, it is a “day” that happens over and over the longer I travel. Surprised? I didn’t really think so.

The bus arrives 6 hours late, the air conditioning stops working, I see a dead man on the street (not kidding here, people), I slam my thumb between the boat and the dock so badly my ring is embedded in my finger (and a Mayan man wants to use his teeth to get it off), the vegetarian lunch I ordered to make myself feel better comes topped with bacon, the border control agent is about as far from reasonable as one man can get, my quick run to the local market takes over five hours and I miss the Skype call I have been waiting for, it pours so hard that every bag I was carrying starts to break and shred into very unhelpful pieces, and when I finally arrive back “home”, I find that another hostel guest has eaten the food I was planning on preparing for dinner.

We’ve all had those days. The days where we think there would be nothing better than to be home, in a house we never leave, tucked safely into bed, with a cup of tea, as we watch the rain coming down on the other side of a very handy window. It’s these moments when we might think travel isn’t worth it. Not for this. This sucks.

Positive take away: I am stronger than I think I am. Even on the hardest of days, I always get through. It may not go smoothly, but I get through it. Usually I end these days by collapsing into my bed, eating chocolate, or crying until I laugh. But the next day, I am always, up, ready to go again, and once again surprised by my ability to get through the toughest of days. Knowing what I can handle makes me love myself a little more… and that’s never a bad thing.

2. Needing surgery in Nicaragua. I was in El Salvador when a painful boil started to develop and I realized I was going to need medical attention. Since we were moving on soon, I decided to self-treat for a few days, see if it got any better, and go to see a doctor first thing when we arrived in Nicaragua if it didn’t. Well, it didn’t. And after a very uncomfortable boat ride across the border and the longest immigration process I have ever experienced, we found ourselves seeking a hotel that had bathtubs in the bathrooms and a doctor that I felt comfortable taking medial advice from. The first doctor was a no-go and I started to panic that I would not be able to find someone to help me. After a call to our travel insurance company, we decided to seek a second opinion at a hospital in the capital. Further research told me that the hospital we were headed to was “the best in Central America”. Things were looking up. We traveled the distance by cab (a hefty expense on our limited budget) and arrived at the ER. After a brief exam I was told I had staph and needed surgery. Right away. Not exactly my idea of a fun travel experience and certainly the most pain I had been in in a long time.

Positive take away: Health care around the world is not scary. While having surgery in a foreign country doesn’t top my list of things to do, I must admit that my experience was generally a positive one. My doctor was patient, knowledgeable, and kind. The nurses were as well. My surgery went quickly and smoothly and I had no pain afterwards, despite warnings that I would. Not every hospital is as wonderful as the one I was admitted to. Not every person has access to the best care their country has to offer. However, the notion that quality health care does not exist outside of Western borders is a fallacy. Good to know.

1. Getting Robbed in Guatemala. Never have I been so scared as when a man with a machete stopped us on a path in the middle of nowhere and told my husband to hand over his money. I knew instinctively to freeze and remain utterly calm but in the few seconds it took for my husband to hand over his wallet and for the man to run away, I thought of every awful thing that could happen on a secluded path, on a mountain, with a desperate man wielding a machete. Thankfully neither of us was hurt but our nerves and our faith in humanity was shaken that day. Never again do I want to feel that fear.

Positive take away: The ability to recognize the humanity in someone who does wrong by us. After arriving safely in the next town, we realized quickly that the man who had robbed us had taken nothing but money. Our entire backpacks, our camera, and my own wallet were all left untouched. Upon further reflection we also realized that he had never actually pointed the machete at us- we had been scared enough by its presence. As we talked we realized that the man who had robbed us had not been cruel or violent- he was desperate. You see we were robbed at the end of rainy season. None of the locals had been getting much regular work and coffers were drying up. Families were hungry. The man with the machete was also likely a husband and father in a country where social safety nets are not the norm. Suddenly, we could identify and empathize with the man who robbed us. Were we happy we were robbed? No…. and yes. It is a powerful thing to feel empathy for another human being who has wronged you- to see the humanity in your attacker. It was a valuable lesson and one we carry with us.

As an added bonus, we also realized, with utter clarity, that material possessions are absolutely unimportant to us. We would have given up everything we had in a heartbeat if asked. Knowing this to be true with such clarity has been truly freeing.

All travelers have bad days. What’s important is, as much as possible,  to not let the negative overshadow the positive. What have been some of your worst travel experiences? Have you gained any positive insights from those bad days?